Ice, spikes & grounding
It had been three days of being stuck in the house. I desperately needed to get out. You might be thinking - then why didn’t you just open the door and walk outside? Easier said than done. The Pacific Northwest was hit with a big snow storm. We had two rounds of snow in just a couple days. It wasn’t going away as the temperatures were staying quite cold. Then right as it began to slightly warm, the rain began. That combination is deadly. Like seriously deadly. Snow with a layer of freezing rain produces thick ice. Cars and people slide everywhere. Ice in this setting can destroy a car, your bones and even take a life.
Lucky for me, I bought my son Max a pair of crampons for his shoes. For those of you who have no idea what I’m talking about, crampons attach to the bottom of your shoes. The spikes sticking out of them act as traction in the ice or packed snow. Max helped me put these crampons on my shoes. I layered up, grabbed my super warm hooded coat and gloves. I popped my over-the-ear headphones on and I was ready to brave the cold. It felt so nice to be outside despite the fact that it was barely over 30 degrees. Even with the crampons, I had to focus on staying stable as I shoved each foot into the ice so the spikes made a decent connection. Pilot and I wandered the neighborhood while she stuck her nose in the snow and ice trying to find scents of her furry friends.
Fast forward two days - the snow had stopped, temperatures stayed above freezing during the day and the rain continued. This combination allowed for a slow melt of the ice. Once again I headed outside with Pilot. This time I wore my hiking boots thinking that deep tread would be sufficient. As we walked through the neighborhood, I looked for patches of concrete as the ice was still very slippery. I felt so vulnerable as I would step and then quickly realize I was slipping.
In micro-seconds I found my mind filling with fear that I was losing my balance and about to hit the ground. Whew…I made it. Then it happened again. That time I barely made it. Pilot was not making things better as her excitement at finding new scents made it so that she was often leading and pulling me faster than I could safely go. I began to notice my body becoming rigid with fear and anger. I was losing control. I felt frustrated and wanted to just go home and quit this stupid walk.
Looking back on this experience, it got me thinking about the importance of feeling grounded. All of what I was experiencing on the ice could easily be a metaphor for life. If the ground underneath you doesn’t feel solid, if your world is swirling and you don’t feel connected, then feelings of fear and anger may easily surface. Your body feels a threat. It knows there is a possibility that you may become hurt or injured - emotionaly and/or physically. You are not relaxed. In fact, the cortisol and adrenaline are starting to pump through your body and your nervous system is preparing for danger. You may even look for someone to blame for the situation, like I did with Pilot. She wasn’t doing anything that another dog wouldn’t do, yet I was yelling at her because I was feeling incredibly vulnerable.
So what does it mean to feel grounded? A simple explanation would be to feel stable and connected to the earth, to the moment you’re in. Our culture expects you to get it all done. There is so much to check off your list, to deal with, to manage - that you often hover over all of it as you check the boxes. While navigating it all, you can easily become disconnected from your footing or your awareness. When you feel this instability, other emotions surface like uncertainty, anger, resentment, fear and frustration.
So how do you reconnect? How do you ground your physical and emotional body? I’ll share a few ways that are very accessible.
Deep breathing: Practice slow, deep breaths. Inhale deeply through the nose, hold for a few seconds, and exhale slowly through the mouth. This helps regulate the nervous system.
Mindfulness meditation: Focus on the breath or observe your thoughts without judgment while your body takes a moment to calm.
Body scan: Check in with yourself by doing a body scan, where you pay attention to each part of your body, starting from the toes and moving up. This increases awareness and reduces tension.
Use your senses: Engage your senses. Notice the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures around you. This helps bring your attention inward, to the present moment.
Connect with nature: Spending time in nature or bringing elements of nature indoors can have a grounding effect. Walking barefoot on grass or soil is also known as "earthing."
Physical activity: Engaging in physical activities, whether it's yoga, tai chi, or simply going for a walk, can help you connect with the earth, release tension and promote a sense of connection to the body.
Guided imagery: Use visualization exercises to go to your happy, safe and peaceful place.
Journaling: Express your thoughts and feelings through journaling. Writing can provide a release and help gain clarity.
Connection with others: Social support is essential. Grab a coffee with a friend or hop on a call with someone you trust. Feeling connected can contribute to a sense of grounding.
Remember, everyone is different, so it's important to explore these techniques and find what works best for you. Additionally, seeking professional help, such as therapy or counseling, can be beneficial if you’re struggling with persistent feelings of being ungrounded. For starters though, be sure you’re wearing the right shoes! :)